-ani difranco

i want you to know me something of me. because i am human and we all have a story to tell. i want someone to read mine.

on august 16, 1981 my mother went into labor just after the 11'oclock sunday mass. that afternoon she delivered her second child. it's a girl! and so began my world. i would be the second and last daughter, they would go on to have one more child;my brother, my father's namesake.

i was always a strange kid. perhaps because i was the middle child, or more likely because i had [have] an overactive imagination. regardless, i had a truly happy childhood. that fact remains and i will always be greatful for it. i grew up in the suburbs of a small middle class conneticut town. my family was large, full of love, and all lived in close proximety so there were always pleanty of birthday parties and cookouts.

there was something different about me from an early age. i just wasn't like the other girls. then again i wasn't like the boys either. luckily i had supportive people in my life who let me grow and explore my world on my own. i was a tomboy who wouldn't wear a shirt and carried a doll by my side at all times. though i am sure there were signs that i would grow up to be "different," i am sure i could have had the exact same childhood and grown up to be an average well adjusted woman. but i didn't... i grew up to be an average well adjusted man.

my story does not begin or end with me being transgendered. it is a big part of who i am but it is not all of who i am. i am 22 years old, i live in maine with my partner, anna, and my guinea pig, benjamin james. i work in a kitchen washind dishes part time, as a photographer part time, and i also babysit. i was a full time college student for three years; two years in rhode island, one year in maine. i am just now back at school part time trying to finish my undergrad, which will probably be in women's studies or writing. i feel pationatly about a lot of causes but i have spent a lot of my energy in queer and trans activism. someday i hope to make a living through my writing and photography so i can be a stay at home dad. i dream of four children with anna and a beautiful life together.

i am not angry that i was born female and i am not angry that i was not born male. i don't have regrets. i will not use the word lucky, but i was born, raised, and socialized as female for eighteen years- that is a lot of history and i don't want to forget that. all the expiriences i have had helped shape me to be exactly who i am today. that doesn't mean this is always easy, but i can't imagine it any other way.

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